Transcript:TWIS.ORG July 21, 2009

Synopsis: Short Legs In A Single Step, A Bloody Mess, Screaming Moths, This Week in The End Of The World, Ancient Dung balls Tell Tales, A Catastrophic Reduction, and Interview w/ Physicist Jon Singleton About Traveling Faster Than Light.

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

Welcome to life! Don’t be bashful. Don’t be shy. There’s no need to walk on by. This is it. The big go around on Theme Park Earth. No pushing now. No need to crowd yourselves. It doesn’t matter where you’re standing now, as the line is irrelevant to where you will end up.

The maps you are handed at the entrance are for general reference purposes only and should not be considered entirely accurate navigating the many points of interest ahead as they were printed before your life was conceived and may bare little resemblance to it once your events are unfolded. There’s a lot to see here if it is your first day on the planet or if you’ve been here for a while now.

And while the rides have ups and downs and bubble gum may occasionally get stuck in your shoes, keep in mind that much like the following hour of programming, this does not necessarily represent the views or opinions at the University of California at Davis, KDVS or its sponsors.

If you think you have seen it all, I encourage you to take another look as the park is under constant renovation. If you have yet to see it all, I highly recommend starting at one of the planet’s many informational booths such as This Week in Science, coming up next.
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Transcript-TWIS.ORG Nov 25, 2008

Synopsis: Miracles fruit from Japan makes bitter tastes seem sweet, Flies Gone Wild delivering larva instead of eggs, Mammoth Operations, To the Birds, Sweet Space, Planetary Discovery, Madness, Genetic Explanations, and Learning to Speak.

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

The following hour of our programming deals with subject matter too interesting from most audiences. The show’s content does not represent the views or opinions of University of California at Davis, KDVS or its sponsors as there is no way to tell what the host will say or do while under the influence of breaking science news stories.

The subjects covered here can at times be controversial, often debatable and endlessly offensive even to those who hold world’s views founded without scientific facts.

And while this host may perhaps arrogantly at times, hold scientific fact to be a greater truth in other beliefs or reasonings, it should be noted that the universe is much stranger than any of us realize. It is just now beginning to hint to us the bizarre nature of its quantum mechanical and biological inter-workings.

Such strangeness awaits us in this next hour. Such strangeness that has the power to change what you know about the universe you live in. So, get ready to have your reality altered with This Week in Science, coming up next.
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Transcript-TWIS.ORG Jan 6, 2009


Synopsis: Tiny Eyes, Roving Mars, Feeling Secure, Vitamin Hopes, Alcoholic Assays, and an Interview w/ Scott Sigler re: Contagious.

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

The following hour of programming does not necessarily represent the views or opinions of the University of California at Davis, KDVS or its sponsors. This is lucky because if it did, it would be very boring, all about when you can take a class, what after school or things you can be doing, all kinds of boring UCD stuff.

Instead, we bring you the cutting edge in science-y news. Stay tuned, This Week in Science is coming up next.
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Transcript-TWIS.ORG July 14, 2009


Synopsis: Skinny Monkey with less calorie intake live longer? Bacterial Bloat, Flower Power burst confounds Darwin, When Good Words Go Bad, World Robot Domination–crickets, bats, Bad Words Done Good, and Interview w/ Chris Mooney, author of Unscientific America

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

Science! The act of learning by a careful observation that often starts fast in a question, a “how”, a “what”, a “why”, sort of a thing is followed up then by experiment, observation. This is the basis of the whole scientific set up, observing, testing, observing some more and then learning from it.

We have taken the simple act of looking at things to a wide-range of amazing places in recent years. Making observations of everything from spinning electrons to orbiting planets and distant stars, from the double Helix to galaxy clusters, billions of light years away from our Earthly observatory.

And between the gathering of the stars, we humans plot these points of interests, seek out more and even create new ones ourselves. The picture that is forming is actually quite stunning, both in what it reveals and in our ability to reveal it.

If the human may be allowed a narcissistic moment to lavish phrase upon humanity itself, I think we’re doing a really good job. And while spinning clusters of observant narcissistic humans, much like the following hour of our programming, do not necessarily represent the views or opinions of the University of California at Davis, KDVS or its sponsors.

We can all take pride knowing that, of all the life forms on planet Earth, it is we humans who have contributed the most to scientific knowledge. We are so well adapted to learning new things that at times it seems, we just can’t get enough. Even now, even this very moment, we are eager to perform the act of observing as we turn our attentions to another episode of, This Week In Science, coming up next.
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Transcript-TWIS.ORG Dec 16, 2008


Synopsis: Science in the White House!, Jellyfish Rule, Brain Reading, This Week in the End of the World, Penile Precautions, and This Week in World Robot Domination Interview with David Calkins

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

As many of the season are watching movie about the “Earth standing still”, the real world continues on its breakneck pace down an uncertain path. While science is working hard to make this short sidedness of human consumption a sustainable path, there is a price for if we do not choose to change, we must choose to fund.

From elementary to the cutting edge, science must be funded as if our very lives depended on it because in fact, they may and those sustaining short-sighted humans much like the following hour of our program does not necessarily represent the views or opinions of the University of California at Davis, KDVS or its sponsors.

We can not continue to simply duck the issues of climate crisis being thrown at us by our past irresponsible actions. We must recognize before it’s too late that the heat is on.

For history records us as having put our ill-annoyed climate heats up for (unintelligible), we may find our globanatorial position on Earth getting beseeched by even greater consequences. ]

We don’t need a hospital alien invasion that tells our days are ruefully numbered, as cool as that might be, all we really need is This Week in Science, coming up next.
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Transcript-TWIS.ORG Dec 23, 2008

Synopsis: The Top 11 Science Stories of 2008… Merry TWIS-mas!!!

Justin/Kirsten: We wish you a Merry TWIS-mas. We wish you a Merry TWIS-mas. We wish you a Merry TWIS-mas and a Happy New Year.

Bring us some sciencey stories. Oh, bring us some sciencey stories. Oh, bring us some sciencey stories.

Justin: We want them right now.

Kirsten: Right now.

Justin/Kirsten: We won’t go until we get some. We won’t go until we get some. We won’t go until we get some. So bring them right now.

Kirsten: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

You are listening to This Week in Science. And…
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Transcript-TWIS.ORG Jan 13, 2009

Synopsis: Kirsten was late here!Transmission Dismission, Chemical Replication, Defrosting Beef, Little Girl is Back!, My How the Fruit Flies, Mossie Love Songs, This Week in Science History, and Headline Round-up.

Kirsten: Today’s show is brought to you by Audible. Please visit www.audiblepodcast.com/twis for your free Audio Book download.

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

There are more dinosaurs that have been discovered that you have never heard of than there are ones that you know about. For that matter, there are more creatures living on the planet today that you don’t know about than there are creatures living on the planet that you do know about.

There are more colors in the garden than your eye can see. There are more stars in unknown universe than our grains of sand and all the beaches of planet Earth.

There are more ways to the human heart than soft words or surgery, while a little knowledge is dangerous. More knowledge will make you down right lethal.

There are more reasons for the things you are thinking than the fact that they were thought by your brain. There are more discoveries in Science taking place now than any other time in the history of scientific pursuit. And the number of findings will continue to grow as technology becomes more and more efficient over time.

And while this pursuit of Moore’s Law like the following hour of our programming does not necessarily represent the views or opinions of the University of California Davis, KDVS or its sponsors.

And while the pursuit cannot be grammatically stated that one thing is more truer than another it is true that there is more going on between the gutter and the stars than what is happening in the day you are now having. Still, we understand how busy your brain must be keeping up with the push and pull of being a human.

So, we offer you an easy way to keep the universe under your skullcap without having to wonder what more you should be knowing about. We accomplish this by offering you more This Week in Science, coming up next.
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Transcript-TWIS.org Feb 3, 2009


Synopsis: One-Sided Monopole Magnets, Ballsy Mice equal men in risk assessments, Algae Genes changed to produce biofuels, Blowing Hard, Cosmic Extremes detected in deep holes, Glss Froggy Discoveries, and the Minion Mailbag.

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

The following hour of programming is not intended for entertainment purposes. It is instead a carefully crafted experiment to see whether or not subjects, given the opportunity, will tune into a show about cutting edge science news.

If successful, the experiment will be followed up by a further study. To see whether or not those same subjects will be willing to participate in overthrowing world governments and installing in their place a philosopher king state run by scientists.

If unsuccessful, the scientist once dead — dedicate themselves to ushering in the age of World Robot Domination by creating an army of robots who will overthrow world governments and install in their place a philosopher free overlord state run by robots.

In either scenario, the experiment, its outcome, and the resulting consequences do not necessarily represent the views or opinions of the University of California at Davis, KDVS or its sponsors.

People of Earth, you have been warned. The choice is now yours. Toil thanklessly under the impressive butt-boot of robotic master or live freely in an ideal futuristic society of eudaimonian bliss by listening to This Week in Science, coming up next.
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Transcript-TWIS.ORG jan 27, 2009


Synopsis: The End of the World Dead sea zones, This Week in Evolution, Why Being an Astronaut Isn’t So Hip, Police and Non Lethal Weapons increases death rates? Don’t Mix, Recess Makes You Smarter, and Interview on Autism w/ Dr. Simon Baron-Cohen

Kirsten: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

I’m not Justin. You are listening to This Week in Science. And anything that you hear during the next hour does not represent the views of the University of California, at Davis, ASUCD or even KDVS. This is all us.

Justin: Good morning, Kirsten!

Kirsten: Good morning, Justin! Welcome everyone. It’s This Week in Science. And we have so much science news. We have a great show ahead. We are planning to interview Dr. Simon Baron-Cohen today.

Justin: For the second time.

Kirsten: For the second time.

Justin: We’re planning to have.

Kirsten: Exactly. We’ll see. We’ll make sure all the phone numbers are accurate and all of the overseas connections are working properly. You know, I went out and hand check all the under sea cables just to make sure it’s going to work.

Justin: Nice. See. That’s why you’re so thorough, Kirsten.

Kirsten: I know, I plan – I really do try and plan ahead when I’m producing a show. What do I have today? I have got stories about The End of the World and Evolution.
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Transcript-TWIS.ORG Jan 20, 2009

Synopsis: Martian methane plumes Gassiness, Our Hologram Universe, Hydras to the Rescue for MRSA, Female Strength in nutritional deprivation, TWIS Mailbag, and More!

Justin: Disclaimer! Disclaimer! Disclaimer!

As the United States inaugurates a new leader and the scientific community at large awaits the promise of fresh leadership in scientific pursuit, there are so many stories rapidly unfolding in science that any form of leadership will find it hard to remain out in front of the uncoverings, discoverings and the brilliant new understandings of the universe at all.

What science awaits now is a leader with the vision to fully fund our future despite our current bank balance; to take the lead on tough policy issues by knowing when to simply get out of the way of them; to dedicate the nation to rebuilding our educational infrastructure in which scientific thought is cultivated without giving deference to religious dogma; to establish the building blocks for sustainable energy at home that can power us to an eventual lunar landing and marching conquest; to make it clear now, that we are one people, that there are no red states or blue states, this last point perhaps being the most important of all because if we find ourselves without this commonality between red states and blue states now, we will surely be lost when we are nation of red and blue planets.

And while Marsifest Destiny much like the following hour of our programming doesn’t necessarily represent the views or opinions of the University of California Davis, KDVS or its sponsors. We can all take a moment this day to welcome a new American President to the world stage and join him in solemn swearing to take an oath not just to a nation but to our collective future and the better aspirations of our common past.

For instance we here at This Week in Science do solemnly swear to faithfully execute to the best of our own abilities, This Week in Science, coming up next.
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